What is the fifth Commandment?
Honor thy father and thy mother, that it may be well with thee, and that thou mayest live long on the good land, which the Lord thy God gives to thee. [Exodus 20:12 Brenton's LXX; cf. Deut. 5:16]
How is this Commandment to be understood?
This Commandment requires us to honor our parents, and to render all obedience and respect unto them, as they both begat us, and raised us up. And even natural reason would teach us that it was highly just and good to love those from whom we came, even although there were not any Command of God to oblige us to do so. For we are beholden unto them for the highest of all benefits, and which we can, in no wise, possibly make them a like return of, inasmuch as we can, by no means, beget those who begot us; and therefore since, next to God, we have not received from any so great benefits as from them, (except spiritual gifts) assuredly unto them do we owe the highest affection and obedience. In these words, father and mother, this Commandment likewise includes all those from whom we receive any good, as our spiritual fathers, our teachers, masters, kindred, kings, magistrates, and the like; which the Apostle declared in these words: Let every soul be subject to authorities which govern. [Rom. 13:1a ONT] And again, to whom the honor, the honor. [Rom. 13:7b ONT] And he called those who are disobedient to parents, without understanding [Rom. 1:30b, 31a ONT]. However, we must be careful that nothing be contrary to the Glory of God, or his most holy Commandments; always remembering, that we must obey God rather than our parents. According to the Doctrine of Christ, The one who loveth father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me. [Mt. 10:37a ONT] And the same is to be understood of all our superiors. Lastly, we should let this regard and respect, that we owe to our superiors, shine forth in goodwill and submission; and speaking honorably of them, and the like.
Q. What is required in the Fifth Commandment?
A. It is required of us to honor and respect not only our natural parents, but also those that are in the dignity and place of parents, and have any degree of authority over us.
Q. Who are those that can justly demand this respect from us, and what honor and reverence is due to them respectively?
A.
1. In the first place, kings and magistrates, who rule over us in the Lord, are to us in the place of fathers, whose duty it is to defend their subjects, and seek what is best for them, both in temporals and spirituals, and therefore must have a watchful eye to all ecclesiastical, military, and civil affairs, that men do conscientiously execute their respective employments, and this is, next God, the highest Fatherly Dignity. Subjects are duty bound, as obedient sons, to manifest their subjection to kings, as follows:
1. They must love and honor them, never name them but with sentiments of profound respect.
2. Offer unfeigned prayers to the almighty for their health and long life.
3. Obey their just commands without murmuring.
4. Venture their lives cheerfully, to defend them against the enemies, rebels, and traitors of their persons and government.
5. Pay taxes and other customary impositions cheerfully.
2. Next to kings and sovereign princes, spiritual governors, senators, judges, and generals of armies, and other magistrates, are vested likewise with the fatherly dignity. The duty of ecclesiastical governors is, to lead the people in the Way to salvation. The civil magistrate should distribute justice without respect to persons. The general must promote military discipline, and inspire the soldiery with Christian courage. Inferiors must love and respect their superiors, pray for them, and cheerfully obey all their just commands.
3. The third order of men that are vested with fatherly authority, are our natural parents, viz., fathers and mothers: for though according to nature, they claim the first place, yet in a civil society, the persons above mentioned, as promoters of the public good, deserve greater honor than they. It is the duty of parents, to seek and promote the wellbeing and happiness of their children; to whom they owe these three things:
1. To nourish them, and take care of their health, until they are able to act for themselves, and afterwards promote their happiness according to the laws of the land, to the best of their power.
2. To season their tender minds with the early knowledge and fear of God.
3. To take care to have them instructed in some trade or calling suitable to their respective capacities, whereby they may be able to provide for themselves.
The duty of children, is to love, fear, and obey their parents, to esteem them very highly, and never without leave presume to sit in their presence, nor to undertake anything of moment, such as matrimony, or a monastic life, without the approbation of their parents. If the parent through any disaster come to poverty, the children should help them cheerfully, and even instruct them in the knowledge and fear of God, of they have had the advantage of a better education than their parents have had, but this is to be done with a great deal of respect and modesty, like a wise physician, and not by way of command.
4. The nearest relations, as uncles and aunts, the eldest brother, etc., are likewise invested with a fatherly authority, and a great deal of respect and honor is due to them, though in a lower degree than to our parents.
5. Benefactors, who out of mere Charity, without any view of advantage to themselves, do good to others, and more especially to such as are orphans and helpless, and bring them up as their own children; a child is in duty bound to love, fear, and honor such as his good patron, as if he had been his own father.
6. Those who instruct youth in any useful knowledge, as in the mystery of any trade, do partake of the fatherly authority, and are bound to teach their disciples or apprentices meekly all that they know, with all the expedition possible. The learner should obey, love and respect his teacher as his father, though he rewards him for his labor, but if he teaches him gratis, such a teacher is worthy of double honor, for he stands in his father's stead.
7. Landlords, master of hired servants, and those of slaves, either bought with money, or taken in war, stand in the place of fathers, and it is then duty to instruct them in the knowledge of religion, to give them what is necessary for their sustenance, and chastise them for their amendment, but not to satisfy a peevish passion, and pay them their wages; and not exact from their tenants any unreasonable and unjust payments. Servants owe filial love and obedience to their masters, and they must serve them faithfully and diligently, without lying, or embezzling or wasting their master's goods, but promote his interest as their own.
8. Aged persons stand in the place of parents, though civil authority takes place before age, for a young king is a father to his aged subjects. The aged should not despise young men, who are otherwise of the same dignity and order, and it is the duty of a young man, to testify all outward marks of respect towards their seniors. by giving them the best place, and all other tokens of civility. It clearly appears from what has been said, that all those who don't comply with these respective duties above mentioned, are transgressors of this Commandment.
Objection. I am at a loss how to behave myself, when one, to whom I owe filial obedience, commands, and another, who likewise stands in the same degree of parental authority, forbids me the same thing?
Answer. When neither of these have authority over the other, then you must have a regard for what is commanded, and not to the persons that command. For if your master, to whom you owe fidelity and service, commands you any lawful thing, and your father forbids it, obey your master, and not your father. But if one is superior in dignity to the other, obey that superior person; for if thy father or thy master command thee any thing that is against the order of the magistrate, obey the civil power, and not thy father or master. But if the magistrate bids thee to do any thing that the Czar forbids, by all means obey the Czar.
Q. What special duties are prescribed by the fifth commandment in regard to parents, under the general phrase of honoring them?
A.
1. To behave respectfully to them.
2. To obey them.
3. To support and comfort them in sickness and age.
4. After their death, as well as during their lives, to pray for the salvation of their souls; and faithfully to fulfill their last wills, so far as they are not contrary to law, divine or civil.
[Now when they that were with Gorgias had fought long, ... Judas called upon the Lord, that he would shew himself to be their helper and leader of the battle. ... and rushing unawares upon Gorgias’ men, he put them to flight. ... And upon the day following, as the use had been, Judas and his company came to take up the bodies of them that were slain, and to bury them ... All men therefore praising the Lord, the righteous Judge, ... Betook themselves unto prayer, and besought him that the sin committed might wholly be put out of remembrance. ... And when he had made a gathering throughout the company to the sum of two thousand drachms of silver, he sent it to Jerusalem to offer a sin offering, doing therein very well and honestly, in that he was mindful of the resurrection: For if he had not hoped that they that were slain should have risen again, it had been superfluous and vain to pray for the dead. And also in that he perceived that there was great favour laid up for those that died godly, it was an holy and good thought. Whereupon he made a reconciliation for the dead, that they might be delivered from sin. (II Maccabees 12:36-45 Brenton's LXX)]
[Therefore thus saith the Lord; Since the sons of Jonadab the son of Rechab have hearkened to the command of their father, to do as their father commanded them: there shall never be wanting a man of the sons of Jonadab the son of Rechab to stand before my face while the earth remains. (Ieremias 42:18-19 Brenton's LXX)]
Q. What degree of sin is there in undutifulness to parents?
A. In proportion as it is easy and natural to love and honor parents, to whom we owe our being, the more grievous is the sin of undutifulness towards them: for this cause in the law of Moses he that cursed father or mother was to be put to death. [He that reviles his father or his mother shall surely die. (Exod. 21:17 Brenton's LXX)]
Q. Why has this particular commandment to honor parents a promise added to it of prosperity and long life?
A. That men by a visible reward might be the more moved to fulfill a commandment, on which the good order first of families and afterwards of all social life depends.
Q. How is this promise fulfilled?
A. The examples of the old Patriarchs or Fathers show that God gives special force to the blessing of parents. [Cf. the story of Isaac blessing Jacob and Esau in Genesis 27.] The blessing of the father establisheth the houses of the children. [Sirach 3:9a Brenton's LXX] God of His wise and just providence specially protects the life and promotes the prosperity of such as honor their parents upon earth: but for the perfect reward of the perfect virtue He gives everlasting life and blessedness in the heavenly country.
Q. Why in those commandments that teach love to our neighbors is mention made first of all of parents?
A. Because parents are naturally nearer to us than all others.
Q. Are there not others also to be understood in the fifth Commandment under the name of parents?
A. Yes; all who in different relations stand to us in the place of parents.
Q. Who stand to us in the place of parents?
A.
1. Our Sovereign and our country: for an empire is a great family, in which the sovereign is father, and the subjects are children of the sovereign and their country.
2. Our Spiritual Pastors and Teachers: for they by their doctrine and by the Sacraments beget us to spiritual life, and nurture us up in it.
3. Our Elders in age.
4. Our Benefactors.
5. Our Governors, or superiors, in different relations.
Q. How does Holy Scripture speak of the honor due to the sovereign?
A. Let every soul be subject to authorities which govern. For there is no authority except from God, and the existing authorities have been appointed by God. So that the one who sets himself against the authority hath withstood the ordinance of God. Wherefore it is necessary to be subject, not only because of the wrath, but also because of the conscience. [Rom. 13:1, 2a, 5 ONT] My son, fear God and the king; and do not disobey either of them. [Prov. 24:21 Brenton's LXX] Render therefore the things of Cæsar to Cæsar, and the things of God to God. [Mt. 22:21b ONT] Be fearing God, be honoring the king. [1 Pe. 2:17b ONT]
Q. How far should love to our sovereign and country go?
A. So far as to make us ready to lay down our life for them. [Greater love hath no one than this, that one should lay down his life for his friends. (Jn. 15:13 ONT)]
Q. How does Holy Scripture speak of the duty of honoring spiritual Pastors and Teachers?
A. Be obedient to those who lead you, and keep on submitting, for they are watchful for your souls, as those about to render an account, that they may do this with joy, and not groaning; for this would be unprofitable for you. [Heb. 13:17 ONT]
Q. Is there in Holy Scripture any particular injunction to honor elders in age as parents?
A. The Apostle Paul writes to Timothy thus: Do not rebuke an elder, but exhort him as a father, younger men as brothers, elder women as mothers. [1 Tim. 5:1,2a ONT] Thou shalt rise up before the hoary head, and honor the face of the old man, and shalt fear thy God. [Leviticus 19:32a Brenton's LXX]
Q. How may we be assured that we ought to honor benefactors as parents?
A. By the example of Jesus Christ Himself, who was subject to Joseph; although Joseph was not His father, but only His guardian.
[And His parents were going year by year to Jerusalem at the feast of the passover. And when He was twelve years old, they went up to Jerusalem, according to the custom of the feast. And after they fulfilled the days, as they were returning, the Child Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem. And Joseph and His Mother did not know it. But they, supposing Him to be in the company, went a day’s journey; and they were searching for Him among their kinfolk and among their acquaintances. And not having found Him, they turned round about to Jerusalem seeking Him. And it came to pass, after three days, they found Him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers, both hearing them and questioning them. And all those who heard Him were beside themselves at His comprehension and answers. And after they saw Him, they were amazed; and His Mother said to Him, “Child, why didst Thou do thus to us? Behold, Thy father and I were seeking Thee suffering distress.” And He said to them, “Why is it that ye were seeking Me? Ye know that it is necessary for Me to be in the things of My Father, do ye not?” And they understood not the saying which He spoke to them. And He went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was being subject to them. And His Mother was keeping all these sayings in her heart. (Lk. 2:41-51 ONT)]
Q. Besides these, who are our superiors, whom we must honor after parents, and like them?
A. They, who in place of parents take care of our education, as Governors in schools, and Masters; They who preserve us from irregularities and disorder in society, as civil Magistrates; They who protect us from wrong by the power of the law, as Judges; They to whom the sovereign entrusts the guardianship and defense of the public safety against enemies, as military Commanders; and lastly, Masters, so far as relates to those who serve them, or belong to them.
Q. What does Holy Scripture prescribe as to our duty with respect to Authorities generally?
A. Render then to all their dues: to whom the tribute is due, the tribute; to whom the customs duty, the toll; to whom the fear, the fear; to whom the honor, the honor. [Rom. 13:7 ONT]
Q. How does Holy Scripture speak of the obedience due from servants and serfs to their Masters?
A. Slaves, be obeying your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in simplicity of your heart, as to the Christ, not according to eye-service, as men-pleasers, but as slaves of the Christ, doing the will of God, from the soul. [Eph. 6:5-6 ONT] Household slaves, be subject in all fear to your masters, not only to the good and fair, but also to the crooked. [1 Pe. 2:18 ONT]
Q. If Holy Scripture prescribes duties towards parents, does it not likewise prescribe duties towards children?
A. It does. And fathers, cease provoking your children, but be nurturing them in the instruction and admonition of the Lord. [Eph. 6:4 ONT]
Q. How does Holy Scripture speak of the duty of Pastors towards their spiritual flock?
A. Shepherd the flock of God among you, exercising the episcopal office, not by constraint, but willingly, not for sordid greed of gain, but readily, neither as exercising lordship over the clergy, but becoming examples to the flock. [1 Pe. 5:2-3 ONT]
Q. How does Holy Scripture speak of the duty of them that are in authority, and of Masters?
A. Masters, keep on providing to the slaves that which is just and that which is equal, knowing that ye also have a Master in the heavens. [Col. 4:1 ONT]
Q. How ought we to act, if it fall out that our parents or governors require of us any thing contrary to the faith or to the law of God?
A. In that case we should say to them, as the Apostles said to the rulers of the Jews; Whether it is right before the face of God to hearken to you rather than God, judge ye. [Acts 4:19b ONT] And we should be ready, for the sake of the faith and the law of God, to endure the consequences, whatever they may be.
Q. What is the general name for that quality or virtue, which is required by the fifth commandment?
A. Obedience.